Question: What
is an appropriate age to introduce my kids to formal religion, and how
do I best do it? I don’t subscribe to the same religion in which my
parents raised me, and I don’t want my kids to feel the same as I did
about religion when I was a kid…forced and not for me. - (T.B from Fort Wayne)
Answer by Don Williams, Pastor @ First Assembly Church:
T.B., The
introduction of faith matters in the life of a child is an
extraordinarily important matter. The sooner and more consistently you
intentionally assist in the faith formation of your child the better. A
vast majority of adults for whom a relationship with God is important
in their life today began that journey before middle school.
The
best way to introduce your child to a life of faith is for your to live
that life of faith in front of them. The Jewish Scriptures give some
great guidance as to how to best accomplish that:
5
Love the
Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.
6 These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts.
7 Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you
sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and
when you get up.
8 Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads.
9 Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates. (Deuteronomy 6:5-9, The Bible).
In
other words, you lead the way. Some people embrace the notion that we
should just through the world's religions on the table and let our kids
pick one out like a slice of pizza from the buffet. Matters of faith
are too important for us to simply throw our kids into the currents of
religious culture and home they find a groove that fits them.
Ultimately, it's really not about introducing them to a religious
system. Parents can teach children to master the mechanics of worship
and yet totally miss the point. The point is not the system. The point
is the discovery of God and the development of a relationship with the
Lord. I encourage you to begin asking this question to people you know:
"Where is a community of faith where God is more than just a word?"
Then take your children) there. Find a place where the presentation of
teaching is age-appropriate, involves you as a parent, and keeps
it focused on the basics. When asked what the basics are, Jesus of
Nazareth once answered,
‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’38
This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ (Matthew 22:38-39, The Bible).
Find
a community of faith that keeps the main things the main things, and
that will be a great place to introduce your child to a life of faith.
Answer by Don Wismer @ Connexion Church, Fort Wayne: What is an
appropriate age to introduce my kids to formal religion, and how do I
best do it? I don’t subscribe to the same religion in which my parents
raised me, and I don’t want my kids to feel the same as I did about
religion when I was a kid…forced and not for me.
I think
parents should involve their kids in faith development as soon as
possible. Notice I said faith development instead of religion. Religion
has connotations of rules and regulations and unfortunately gets in the
way sometimes of real spiritual growth. Nobody likes to be forced to do
anything, sorry that was your experience. Take your kids to a church
that you feel best represents the body of Christ. Look at the
churches children's ministries to make sure they are safe and secure
and that involve your kids in activities that they enjoy and cant
wait to come back for. If you find a place where your kids are loved
and cared for and taught the basics of the Christian faith, no age is
too young. By the way, kids who sit in on so called adult church can
pick up a whole lot more than you think; they're listening and watching
all the time. Just because they're young doesn't mean they have lesser
access to the Holy Spirit who can teach them in ways appropriate for
their personality and age. They can often teach us things in simple and
profound ways as well.
Answer by: Rick Taylor, Pastor - New Haven United Methodist Church: T.B.,For me, formal religion is more than a
set of beliefs and habits. It is my belief that God created all life,
has a purpose for this life. God revealed the essence of his heart in
his son Jesus, namely that God wants to have an ongoing relationship
with each us. I believe you introduce children to this fantastic relationship at any age.
At some point in your child's life he
or she will test the beliefs and spiritual relationship with God you
have lived and introduced to them. This is part of their testing and
making this relationship with God's their relationship. Some children
will do this testing in a very gentle way and some children do this
testing in a very resistive fashion. The Bible has some relevant
stories of how various people tested the reality of faith in God and
Jesus.
Pastor Rick